What Now?

Have you ever sat there and wondered "what now". Two months into my marriage and I cannot believe I'm sitting here completely stress free. I don't have to worry about alcoholic childlike mother, my once abusive father, I don't have to worry about my Mother's drunk husband coming into my  begging me to let him touch me. I don't have to stress about how to get over the "homeless" stigma that followed or the stress of trying to make ends meet. At 21 I have it all. Or at least, I have everything I ever wanted. The simple life. I feel as if most people out there are chasing the impossible. People want to be successful, they want to be loved, they want an easy life, and they don't want to work for it. Of course I'm not saying it isn't attainable, I'm saying people lose sight of what really matters. My Grandmother came to visit two, maybe three weeks ago and kept tearing me down. It wasn't that she didn't mean well, it was just that she kept pushing this materialistic view on life, that money ruled above all. Now, I definitely don't believe I'm wiser than her. Yet, I disagree. I grew up with out the nicer things, most kids thought I was homeless growing up. I didn't have the latest toys, or gadgets. I had clothes that were too big for me because they were passed down from my Aunt or my cousins. My Grandmother is in her 60's, she has as much money as she needs to get by but she isn't happy. She lost sight of what mattered. In her self declaration of independence, she gave away her son, she worked 12 hours, 7 days a week. Never taking a break. She taught me to be strong, that I didn't need a man to take care of me, but told me to marry rich so I never have to work hard for myself. It completely contradicted her actions. Believe me, she tried to marry rich, yet she never stayed. Ironically, my other Grandmother actually married 5 times with the same mentality and each time it ended in a lot of pain. Both of which never really found happiness. My Mother is expecting a child sometime in February, or so I've been told. (Lied about last pregnancy) This child is somehow supposed to fix the fact that she lost custody of all three of her kids, that she blames herself for my grandmother's death, or that her marriage is dying. She's always chasing the next best thing. Whether it's approval, pity, sympathy, or money. I never wanted to be like her. I feel my relationship works so well because neither of us is difficult to please. He's older and doesn't have the patience for the unnecessary drama. It's incredible. Yet, I'm sitting here thinking "what now". I've over come so many obstacles in life and I cannot believe that life would get so much better. So here's the answer to my "What Now" I'm going to continue to grasp onto that new found hope, I'm to keep striving for the important things in life and I refuse to lose sight in what is absolutely the most important thing in my life.